Jesus Goes To Yoga Class

Yes, fans, it's Q & A time again. This time I'm answering a bunch of huge, existential questions and if I really had all the answers I could start my own church or perhaps people would start thinking I'm the Messiah. Which I'm not.

How can spirituality impact healing and recovery? Are there any studies about this?

            First let’s define spirituality. In my book it’s a felt connection to something Beyond, to something Higher that transcends our individual little selves. I think it also means how we view life, where we find meaning, what we believe about pain in life, what we believe happens when we die. These are spiritual questions and different religions have different answers.

            Our answers to these spiritual questions greatly impact our healing and recovery. If we believe that life should be daily candy and unicorns then we’re going to be pretty pissed when we get a flat tire—or a cancer diagnosis.

            But if we believe that everyone gets some sewage thrown their way and that it’s up to each of us to find meaning in it then we’re going to have an entirely different life experience.

            And yes, there are many studies out there and all you have to do is Google “spirituality and healing” and then settle in with enough food and water for a year because that’s how long it will take you to read through them all. Studies are criticized because the bottom line for many science peeps is that human consciousness is derived from the brain, and that its effects are confined to the brain and body of an individual. So forget about prayer because anything you do can’t affect me. But studies show prayer makes a difference. 

            They are basically saying, “It’s not possible so why study it?” A little close-minded, don’t you think?

I don’t practice any organized religion right now, but I’m feeling the need for a spiritual element in my life. How do I go about finding out what is right for me? There are so many practices out there, I’m not sure where to start.

            A good place to start is looking at the spiritual beliefs with which you were raised and asking yourself where are you with those beliefs now. You may be surprised to find that your beliefs have changed or even more surprised to find that they are the same. If you haven’t been raised with any beliefs, then what resonates with you?  Ask yourself the aforementioned questions:

            How do I view life? What do I think about pain and difficulty in life? What do I think happens when I die? Where do I find meaning in my life? What do I need to nurture my spiritual life? A supportive community? Spiritual direction? Solitude?

            Don’t under estimate the value of a supportive community—a church, a sangha, a temple community. We love to think that organized religion is a bunch of mindless drones who all believe the same thing. Ha! Wouldn’t that be so much easier? In fact, my experience is that it is a group of people who are actively exploring their spiritual beliefs and seeking to live them out with support from one another. And it’s not that organized.

More questions next time!

Fear of Recurrence

Happy New Year!

And now for the mail (edited for length):

Your book was recommended to me by a nurse since I had Stage 2b breast cancer. She thought your book might help me feel a little better and that it might help me deal with some issues I had. She was right and I enjoyed it very much. I will be reaching my 1 year diagnosis date on Feb. 23. I'm told the type I had could return at any time because it was in my lymph nodes plus it was an ugly aggressive cancer. Even though I am a Christian and must believe God can heal and is in control, it is hard to ignore the previous statement from the Dr. What are your thoughts to help me with this issue?

Two of my favorite words in the English language: both/and. You can both believe your doctor and believe God can heal. For one thing, your doctor said your cancer could return at any time and that could be 2050. That's the definition of "any time," although we like to think it means "in the next few months."

If you find you are living in a way that is mindful, generous, forgiving, compassionate and playful, because you think cancer could return any second--then carry on.

But if you find that thinking this way has made you fearful, contracted, irritable, impatient and close-minded, then STOP THINKING THIS WAY.

Seriously. I've seen it go either way. Fear of recurrence can liberate you and/or cripple you.

The thought of recurrence crosses my mind a couple times a day and when it does it's like a wake-up call.

Hello? Don't waste a moment.

That doesn't mean I'm crazy busy, it means I'm conscious, aware, curious and grateful for whatever I'm engaged in at the moment: making coffee, turning over in bed, scratching the dog, taking out the garbage, having a bowel movement.

Both/And. It can both drive you crazy and set you free.

And don't worry about choosing between God and your doctor. You know what they say about doctors: they all think they're God anyway.

I'm so glad you liked my book and thanks for taking the time to write.

He Lives!

Max lives! He is going to be okay and apologies to those of you who thought he died because I hadn't posted in a while. It took over our lives for three weeks, but yesterday his wounds healed up enough to take off the hateful Cone! It will take a while for his hair to grow back, but we can live with that.

Here he is in his Christmas outfit, a gift from my boss Stephen and his family. The shirt is perfect--it hides his scars and keeps him warm.

The first few weeks after his surgery we let him sleep on the bed because he was wearing the hateful Cone. But that meant he slept on me. On my chest. On my belly. The first week he wanted to be anywhere on my core. Maybe because I felt as if I had a piece of my heart torn out. And a piece of my soul. Some people thought he was afraid. But I think he was healing me.